4 Ways To Start A Conversation With Someone You Find Attractive

Knowing what to say to someone when you have never spoken to them can be very difficult. It’s hard to think of something, on the spot, to go over and say to somebody – especially if they are minding their own business.

Do you use a pick-up line which might not go down well, or do you get their details which could seem rushed or take them by surprise, or do you ask a question, but what can you ask when you do not know this person?

It can be daunting trying to think of what you can say to someone, especially if you do not want to miss the opportunity to go over.

Here are 4 ways to best open a conversation with a question, as opening with a question has more of a chance to carry a conversation on and not let it fall flat before the conversation even began.

1. Ask a question about them

These are questions that are about the other person, who you are wanting to speak to.

It is usually when we observe or notice something about that person and then ask them a question about it.

If you noticed someone was carrying a book that you have also read or like the author who wrote it, you could ask them a question about their book – you could ask them what other books they like to read or if they have read any other books by that author.

You could ask a question that has anything to do with them, such as if they have any object with them, any piece of clothing or even the drink they have. It could be anything that would be easily noticed by anyone.

2. Ask a question about the surroundings

These are questions that you ask about the surroundings or environment that you are both in.

It is when we observe or notice something about the surroundings and then ask them a question about that.

This could be about your location or the people or objects around you.

If you were at a wedding and wanted to approach someone, you could ask them how they know the wedding couple, this would be about the other people in your environment.

Or if you were at a festival or gig, you could ask them which band they were most excited to see.

These are usually easy questions to ask as you just have to find something in your environment that you could ask them about. You will often be able to highlight common ground by doing this, as you are both in the same place and therefore share some similar reason to be there.

3. Ask for their opinion (or help)

This is when you ask for their opinion on something either to do with yourself or your surroundings or you ask them for help.

Asking for their opinion is better than asking for help, as if you ask for help the conversation may fall flat once they have offered their help!

Asking for an opinion involves getting their own personal view on something – you could ask them what coffee they would recommend from the café, or you could ask them which restaurant they recommend going to.

Asking for their help usually involves facts – you could ask them directions to a particular restaurant. However, once they have given you the directions (that’s if they know where the restaurant is) the conversation could end, and you may have to scramble to figure something else to say.

Asking for their help could work though as once they have offered their help; you could then ask for their opinion afterwards. Once they have told you where the restaurant is, you could ask them if they have been before and if they liked it, and if they haven’t you could ask where would be best to go to eat.

4. Ask if they need help

This may sound very movie cliché and you can only use this if the moment arises, but you could also if an opportunity arises ask them if they need your help or assistance with something.

If you saw someone carrying a lot of bags or struggling to carry something, you could offer to help them.

Or if you work with somebody, or are at college or university, you could ask if they needed help on a particular project or assignment.

Try not to offend them or undermine their ability to do whatever it is they are doing, just offer your help in a friendly and polite manner, be sensitive and highlight that you are just offering to assist them!

If you enjoyed the tips from this blog, they are all taken from our dating course that has over 70 practical tips and advice to help you build confidence and know exactly what to say and do, from the first impression all the way to the first date. Check out our course here!